if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
