My hand turned me down
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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