i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
