Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
