I think I just saw someone hide a body.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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