will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
