I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
