I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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