You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
