Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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