I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
