Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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