Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
