erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Come see our sink grown plant.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
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