Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
