come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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