Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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