Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
