when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
