What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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