I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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