Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
