Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
