He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
