Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
