I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Randomize
