speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
