yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
