just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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