so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
