they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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