She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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