is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
