so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
