Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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