just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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