that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
My liver just had a heart attack.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
