No awkward lesbian experiences without me
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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