at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Randomize
