You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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