I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
