What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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