ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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