Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
