..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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