You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
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