it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."�
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
