He is an equal opportunity slut.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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