im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Randomize
