peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
